Thursday, April 30, 2009

sleepless nights

i have not been able to sleep for 4 days already. i don't really know but i have been restless for the past few days.
i finished my training last week and my presentation really f****ed up. i cannot figure out the financial impact of my so-called project. you see, in the account that i'm handling, we don't get incentives or penalty if we meet/exceed the client requirements or not. my team has met (actually exceeded) the clients goals and we have been consistent in doing so. i had to prepare a project that would enhance our performance and that would target a specific group in my team. the panelist wanted me to show the financial impact of that project and as much as i want to, there is NO money in my project at all. i indicated that by getting obtaining the client's trust and confidence, we may have additional business with them in the future which would generate income. i had to redo it and i am just waiting for the schedule of my presentation with our director (yikes, scary).

maybe this is the reason why i haven’t been sleeping well. i'm not sure why but there's a lot of things in my mind. i have over spent last month and the month before so i am really tight with my budget. i'm trying to save as much as i can. i also gained weight that is why my trainer is furious. he wants me to go on diet and i already did. i've cut down on carbs and red meat. i only eat white meat and veggies but he cannot ask me to not eat anything because I’m going to die for sure. Haha

i haven’t seen and heard anything from the banker. he has not updated me on my account yet and i hope he does because i’m getting paranoid haha. Anyway, I’m going to the gym later and burn all the fats that I have. :(

Friday, April 10, 2009


Pasulpot sulpot na lang ako sa blog ko... goodluck naman...

ano bang bago?

wala lang, dito pa rin ako sa work ko. tinatapos ko rin mga required training para naman umangat. haggard dito sa work pero swerte pa rin kami dahil kahit na crisis may pumapasok pa rin na business sa account namin. it's going to be additional task for me but i don't really mind.
bago na yung trainer ko dahil nagresign yung dati. mabait naman tong baging trainer ko at matyaga naman kahit mapanlait. nag lose naman ako ng weight at nabawasan pa yung fat % ko.

wala na akong communication kay mr. banker. di na talaga kami nag uusap ang happy naman ako. lagi nila akong tinatanong kung bakit lagi akong mag isa. sagot ko, masaya akong mag isa. nagagawa ko yung mga gusto kong gawin. it's true sometimes it could be depressing but i always get over it. hindi lang isang lalake ang magiging reason ko to be happy. happy ako dahil ok mama ko. happy ako dahil maraming blessings akong nakukuha. happy ako dahil kahit sobrang pasaway ako i am still healthy and alive.i've stopped my communication with ralf as well. after what happened, wala na akong trust sa kanya. anyway, ganun talaga yun...

hindi nakapasa si mrs. nlj and nlj sa bar exams. naawa ako kay mrs. nlj dahil gustong gusto na niyang magkawork. sabi niya, nag tatampo daw siya kay lord because she studied hard and she prayed naman daw and yet she did not make it. matagal siyang di nagtext sakin and i understand that... kung gusto niya munang mag-isa and mag isip then okay lang. i just hope that she can decide on what she would do next.

wala na kong ibang update. sobrang boring pero busy rin ako lately...